My Currency is Kindness

Kindness has always been the largest currency I’ve used. It might be something as simple as offering a smile or using someone’s name at the store. No matter the form it takes, I’ve learned that kindness is all I really know.

Several years ago, my heart went through what I can only describe as a “rewiring.” It was as if my thought process was undergoing a transformation. I had always considered myself a kind person, but there was a shift in how I viewed the world. I had been very self-focused, unknowingly asking myself, “What’s in it for me?” even in acts of kindness. But as I began to surround myself with new people, leave the place I grew up, and face new experiences, my capacity for compassion grew. My ability to think only about myself started to fade.

I was humbled by challenges and heartaches I could never fully understand. As I began to empathize more with the struggles of my friends and colleagues, it became nearly impossible to remain fixated on my own needs. I started to realize that kindness wasn’t about what I could gain, but rather what I could give.

However, this transformation didn’t happen overnight. I didn’t suddenly become selfless and find all my problems resolved. In fact, as I rewired my heart, I faced a new set of challenges. I struggled with insecurities, a scarcity mindset, and, most of all, feelings of unworthiness. But I was determined to grow.

Kindness had always been important to me, but it wasn’t until my faith deepened and my relationship with Jesus grew that I experienced a shift in how I showed kindness. It was as though my capacity to care was stretched beyond what I thought possible. I started desiring to care for others without any expectation of a return. I began choosing to see people’s hearts—whether or not we had anything in common—and wanting the best for them, regardless of my own circumstances.

Even my frustrations—like the road rage that often flared up during my commutes through busy DC traffic—began to subside. Instead of reacting with aggression, I found myself praying for others. When someone would cut me off or tailgate me, I’d think, “Wow, something must be going on with that person.” And I knew, deep down, that this wasn’t the typical response. But here’s the truth: there is always something going on with people. When we meet anger with anger or aggression with aggression, no one wins. Those emotions only fuel further negativity. Our reactions should be grounded in compassion and kindness.

As I rewired my heart to be more others-focused, I found myself running a kind of experiment—more of an internal investigation, really. I was the first person to overanalyze a text message or react defensively to someone on the road. I questioned whether my response was “good enough” when a friend didn’t reply on my timeline. Eventually, I grew tired of the constant mental battles and decided to make a change. I chose to stop reacting from a place of self-interest. Instead, I began working from a foundation of kindness and removed myself from the equation.

I would remind myself: “Their situation has nothing to do with me.” Whether it was someone cutting me off in traffic or taking too long to reply to a text or a client who hadn’t responded after a meeting, I realized that none of these things had anything to do with me. In those moments, I chose not to internalize their actions. This shift changed my life. It created space for grace—grace that felt abundant, like a gift I had been given, not something I earned.

I often find myself offering grace to others for the tenth time and thinking, This grace isn’t mine to give; it’s a gift from Jesus.

Kindness is an active choice. It’s not about having an infinite supply of grace or being perfect in every interaction. But we can start small. Next time you're at the grocery store, can you offer a smile to the overwhelmed cashier? Or when you're ordering lunch, can you make eye contact with the staff and ask how they are doing? These small acts might seem insignificant, but they can make all the difference.

I challenge you to step beyond yourself. Set aside your own agenda, pain, and insecurities, and truly see those around you. Look them in the eye. Smile so wide that your crow’s feet show. Use their name, because their parents chose it with love. Remember, it’s not about you. The more you recognize this, the more peace you'll find in your day.

Be kind, because someone out there needs your kindness. It might save a life—or maybe, just maybe, it will save yours.

Until then,

Britt

#bekind #showcompassion #chooselove

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