What You Think About, You Bring About!
Our thoughts are incredibly powerful. I’m not just saying that because I’ve been immersed in personal growth for years and have made it a point to “mind my mind.” I believe it because I’ve seen, time and again, how easily we can absorb the thoughts of others—often without realizing it. We go about our daily lives, interacting with people, and then, weeks, months, or even years later, we find ourselves caught up in a feeling or belief that doesn’t quite sit right. As we reflect, we often trace it back to a moment—a conversation that seemed innocuous at the time, but somehow left an imprint.
Have you ever found yourself retracing your steps, realizing that a thought, a feeling, or a limiting belief didn’t actually come from you? Instead, it was shaped by someone else’s words or fears. For instance, you might remember a conversation with a close friend over coffee, where their well-meaning advice unintentionally planted seeds of doubt in your mind. Maybe it was a limiting belief based on their own experiences—or worse, their inability to believe in your potential.
Yes, I said it. Sometimes, even the people who love us the most can become the source of our subconscious doubts. But here's the key: recognizing this isn’t about casting blame. It’s not about distancing yourself from the people you care about. It’s about understanding that words matter. What you think about, you bring about—whether that’s positive or negative. And too often, we allow the fears and limitations of others to define our own mindset, sometimes without even knowing it.
I often say, "The opinions of those we love are often filled with love, but coated with fear." When people offer advice or share their thoughts with us, it’s typically because they care—they want to protect us. But the advice they give may not always serve us in the best way. It might even reflect their own fears or doubts, which, although rooted in love, don’t necessarily have our best interests at heart. And here’s where the challenge lies: how can someone who loves you so much also become the subconscious voice of doubt in your mind?
At some point, we stop recognizing the influence of these well-meaning words and realize that years of internalizing them have brought us to where we are. But here’s the truth: it’s okay. Allowing these thoughts to take root doesn’t make you weak or unworthy. It doesn’t diminish your capabilities or drive. It simply makes you human.
The key is to become aware of these influences and guard your mind. Your friends, family, and loved ones may not always understand the choices you make, and that’s okay. It’s not their job to understand your journey—it’s yours. They love you, but their own fears can sometimes manifest as limiting beliefs they unknowingly pass on to you.
Over the past decade, I’ve been doing a lot of internal work, reflecting on conversations and situations that had me confused or unsure of myself. One of the most eye-opening realizations I had was just how much of an impact my Dad’s thoughts and opinions had on me. His words, always delivered with love, were often coated with fear. The same was true for old friends whose insecurities fed off my lack of confidence, making me feel like I had to play small to fit in with them.
A pivotal moment came after I had surgery (gastric bypass) and began seeking a healthier, more confident version of myself. Suddenly, the dynamics with some of my old friends shifted. My progress toward wholeness threatened their sense of stability. Even my beloved grandfather, who always supported me, questioned my decisions—especially when I started my health and wellness business. It wasn’t that he didn’t believe in me. It was his own fears and doubts, born of his life experiences, that surfaced.
But then something changed. A few years after starting my business, and just before my grandfather passed, he shared a story with me that shifted my perspective completely. He told me about his own journey—how, as a young man in the late 1950s and early 1960s, he ventured into sales and left his small town of Binghamton, New York, to build a new life. At the time, his father—my great-grandfather—had been skeptical, advising him to stay in the factory and find stability. My great-grandfather, who had experienced hardship and struggle, and was sold as an indentured servant as a young man, couldn’t fathom a different path. He had worked hard, but his own fears and lack of vision shaped the advice he gave.
Shortly after my grandfather left home, when he achieved success in sales, he called his father to share his first big commission check. And that was when my great-grandfather finally recognized the courage in his son’s choices. It wasn’t until then that he acknowledged the value of taking risks and stepping outside the box.
This story, shared by my Papa, helped me understand that the limiting beliefs my grandfather had for me were shaped by his own fears and struggles. My Papa was also a dreamer and an entrepreneur but my health and wellness business was something he hadn’t had experience in. His journey was different from mine. My Papa set in motion a new path for our family and genetic line. I believe that my dreams and vision are picking up where my Papa left off. And once I understood that, I was able to free myself from the doubts he had unintentionally passed down.
What I’m trying to say is this: we must guard ourselves against thoughts and advice that won’t serve us. We are the gatekeepers of our own minds. While we can’t control the opinions of others, we can control whether we allow their beliefs to take root in our own thoughts. You have the power to either accept or reject these external influences, and doing so can determine the direction of your life.
I won’t lie to you—this is an ongoing process. Even after more than a decade of consciously guarding my mind, I still find myself uncovering old imprints. The journey is both proactive—actively protecting your mind from negative influences—and reactive—working to uproot those thoughts when they pop up.
Remember: what you think about, you bring about. So, choose your thoughts carefully. Not only will they impact you, but they’ll ripple out into the future, affecting generations to come. Be intentional with your mindset, and protect yourself from anything that doesn’t serve your highest good.